Independence is key

“A woman who creates a full, happy life on her own is a lot more inviting than one who looks to a man to create it for her.” -Mandy Hale


I moved out when I was 18, unaware and sheltered from the world around me. I had been going to church since I was 12 and was taught not to trust anyone or anything, “that everything was out to hurt [me].” For the first year or so, I was shell-shocked and learning so many new and scary things. I made a lot of mistakes and learned a lot of valuable life lessons. I would like to think that even though I had no idea what I was getting into, that I’m more independent and knowledgeable of the world than I would have been if I’d staying living at home for a couple more years. I spent a lot of time alone and I firmly believe that if I hadn’t done this, I wouldn’t be able to be alone today. Many of my friends have this idea that to be happy they need someone else. Being independent is the best quality I think I have. Living alone and working and depending only on myself for everything has molded me into a person that doesn’t need anyone else. I choose when I want someone in my life, I choose what to do and how to do it.

Going from the strong, independent girl above to where I am now was one of the most challenging experiences of my life and there is more to go. I moved in with my boyfriend who encouraged me to go back to school. Which I had been considering for a couple of years since hourly work only gets you so far. So for the first time since I was 18, I depend on someone else, but in a respectful way. He supports me in every dream I have(within reason). Having to depend on someone financially is probably one of the biggest struggles I face. I’ve always supported myself, but in order to grow mentally and in my future career, I have to let him help me. He only wants the best for me and is giving me the greatest opportunity in the world. That’s true love people!

I like to think that my independence is helping me in school now. I’m not the insecure girl I once was. If I need help, I ask. If I need anything, I have to ask; and as much as my pride tries to tell me I don’t, occasionally I need help. It’s hard to silence something that has been so strong for so many years, but sometimes, it’s alright to rely on others, just don’t forget who you are!


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